jy: i hated myself.......... hated myself for being poor... hated myself for not able to take stress.. i wan to have more tolerant, patience, higher stress level lor..i really cant take it... cant take it lor... i had yet to start school but i am tat stress le lor.. how am i going to go thru all these? HOW? i need more money lor............ am i making the right choice to study? maybe i should just give up on study lor... how to go thru this? i need break... i need enjoyment but i dun have the money to enjoy it...i need to pay this and tat.. i need more money for transport to and from school... how how? who can help me? i really need help... i am so so tired of thinking of this....
will i always quarrel wif mum over money issue? maybe i should just borow money from bank instead of borrowing from her... as if what lor.. keep telling ppl tat i going uni and she need to work in order to let me go study but nv mention tat i am saving up every month for the sch fees as well lor.. please lor.. dun say until how noble lor... i am depending greatly on myself and u are helping me.. dun make it sound as if you are supporting 100% of the money lor.. i know it is bad to say tat but it is true.. i hated to hear her saying that she need to work in order to let me study.. i am working v v hard too...really really hard lor....who can understand my stress and unhappy.. who cares.. no one care lor... no one is understanding lor..
i just need a bit of encouragement.. really a bit will at least let me feel better then why cant i have it? is it really tat hard......... I can only depend on myself.. only myself and no one can help me....
i had been thinking alot.. how to survive for next month? when school really start? additional transport cost.. mum go oversea and who will cook.. who will pay for my dinner.. this will be additional cost again.. HOW? how wat can i do... sure will still have to pay household with no decrease.. i know i shouldnt care so much abt this little money.. the problem is i really need the every single cent lor..she expect me to pay her the money tat i owe her.. ok fine.. which i always did... then the money tat she owe me leh.. she refuse to give me.. say pay me in a later date.. how can? then i pay u later la.. v ridiculous lor.. really lor.. the money can at least let me pay for the red packet lor..
I really cannot stand it and really really tired and stress out...
always tell yrself..tml is a brand new day..^@^
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