jy: hmmm.... i didn't expect the day will come so fast.... dunno whether is right or wrong but definitely i had alot of mixed feeling... on one end.. i keep questioning myself... i cant wait to leave and stop doing all the thing... i am really tired..yet when i finally told jd my really final decision after the first that was rejected... everything seem to be not so tensed up.. we can even joke about it... but then i am sad.. i feel really sad... a kind of lost and i started to question myself again... AM i really making the right decision.... i really dunno...
well.. it has been 4 years and about 9 months... going through alot of changes... from only the 3 of us... doing really operation roles to a team of about 20 over ppl... had been changing different roles... i had definitely learn alot.. becoming v resilience... strong... calm... at the same time... gettin more impatient and bad temper... hmmm... guess i am really too tired... the past 6 months was really a challenges.. BIG challenge that really drained all my energy... my everything..
i kind of cant bear to leave.. becos of the ppl... but i know i have to make the decision... i receive different feedback... some had actually question me " why dun i stay on and try out the new structure.. since i am being promise that i no need to do the thing i hated, if let say really can't take it then move it.. is not late afterall" but i know i have to move out of my comfort... i need to see different thing... going into different environment..... although i still havn't thought of wat i really wan to do... but staying at the same comfort will not push me to think thru... in fact.. i will be struck there... for dunno how long........
i think i will really missed all the fun... all the jokes tat we used to have...the ppl who had been going thru the various war together.... hmmm...but i dun like... when i started to feel lousy of myself.. of not being able to perform... is really too much for me to handle.. i guess i am getting old... where.. there are more impt thing tat i treasures and i dun wan to missed out.. like the time wif my family...time for myself while i still can...hmmm.. i dunno if i had given up a good opportunities but since i had made the decision... i wish myself the best as i know only i can help myself... of course i wish the best for the company as well... since i had given all my youth and energy in helping to build up this company.... i dun need to be appreciate la.. but then... no bad feeling or anything.. just need to move on..
will updates more if i have any.. till then .....
I really need a longggggggggggg breakkkkkkkk........................................
always tell yrself..tml is a brand new day..^@^
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